4 Tips to overcome impatience, irritability, and mom guilt
Take a life inventory
Assess how you are feeling right now. What emotions or needs of yours are not being met? Please know that your needs are just as important as any other member of the family. I know it is very common, and even encouraged, for moms to neglect themselves in favor of tending to and giving to their children or others who seem more vulnerable.
I have seen that for many moms who struggle with anger and irritability, one common factor was them not feeling emotionally fulfilled.
Some examples/signs of this are:
- You don’t get to invest time and energy in something you are passionate about
- You don’t regularly do something creative or challenging
- You don’t feel that your gifts and identity is important and adds value to others in a meaningful way
- You don’t have a close friendship with like-minded women or an older/more experienced mentor
- You do not feel loved and valued in your marriage
It is also important to recognize that all areas of your health are important - the emotional, mental, physical and spiritual.
These areas also need to be assessed and addressed if any red flags come up.
Explore and examine how you are experiencing life and whether all your needs are being met.
Rate how confident and satisfied you are with the connection and relationship you enjoy with God every day.
How content are you with how your body is allowing you to fulfill your various roles and responsibilities every day?
Pick 3-5 positive changes/habits each month and stick to them
Now you can start thinking of ways to create more balance and health in each area of your life. Creating a healthier and more balanced life should not be overwhelming. You should be getting away from overwhelm, not adding more!
After you’ve written your inventory of each area in your life, look at the areas that stand out to you. Which needs or shortcomings are most urgent or important to address? Which of these impact your life the most?
Think about the easy but impactful changes you can make to the way you live, and how others can support you to do so. By picking only between 3 and 5 at the most, this makes it easier to alter them or adapt them into your life, and change your schedule so they fit in, while repetition allows them to become habits over time.
Look at diet and supplementation to support your mood
Often, the underlying cause of anger, anxiety, and irritability could be dietary or even symptoms of illness.
If your symptoms are so serious that they are compromising your ability to cope, it is very important that you get a thorough examination by a qualified professional such as a physician or psychologist, to assess whether the underlying cause may need treatment or specialized care.
Some ways that you can start managing these symptoms naturally, besides specialized care or medical protocols:
- Adaptogenic herbs (to reduce the effect of stress): Maca Root, Panax Ginseng, Holy Basil (Tulsi)
- Certain vitamins and minerals: Tryptophan, 5-HTP, Vitamin C, Magnesium, Vitamin D, Vitamin B9, Vitamin B9, Omega 3
- Boosting your intake of foods that support and improve gut health: Probiotics – fermented Sauerkraut, Beet Kvass, fullcream plain Yoghurt with Live Active Cultures, Milk Kefir; Prebiotics – raw Garlic, raw or cooked Onion, under-ripe Bananas, raw Asparagus
There may be other dietary changes which could be made, such as limiting sugar and processed foods, depending on your lifestyle and eating habits.
Connect with a kingdom purpose and calling
Did you know that every one of us has a Kingdom purpose and calling (from God and for God), regardless of our station or location in the world?
God doesn’t only use Clergymen, Counselors, or Spiritual teachers/mentors to shepherd and help people in impactful ways.
Being a mother, you have one of the most important callings for His Kingdom. You have been called to shepherd and guide a young soul, so they can navigate this dark and confusing world while remaining faithful to Him and trusting in Him.
Every single day you have multiple opportunities through which you can teach your child about their identity in Christ, and how they can live and love like Him.
But your purpose and calling do not end in Royal motherhood. Your gifts, character, interests, and passions all offer you many ways to connect with other people and serve them every day.
For me personally, one big shift that freed me from anxiety, constantly up and down moods, and not feeling adequate or good enough for anyone, was learning about and believing the truth about my purpose and calling in this life. Once I started stepping into what I felt God was calling me to do for others and with others, I began experiencing a joy, fulfillment, and passion, unlike anything I’ve experienced before.
But don’t worry, you don’t need to figure this out on your own. God WANTS to guide you.
If you are open to humbly and trustingly receiving His guidance and redirection, He will unveil a journey to a career, hobby, charity, project, business, or other platforms, through which He wants to use everything that is special and unique about you, to help others and draw them to Him.
I hope and pray that these tips have given you some ideas that you can start working on today, to create a more joyful and fun life for yourself, and your family.
If you liked this article, share with me below – what emotional/spiritual need is most unfulfilled for you right now?